Friday, May 13, 2005

Insert Catchy Title Here

Get ready people, for a ride on the Autobahn-esque road that is my life. It’s fun! It’s interesting! It’s…fun?

Um, let’s see. I know this will probably come as a shock to many of you, but it’s true – I hate my job. I joke about it a lot, but now I mean it. Hate. Job. Yesterday was a particularly bad day (there was crying) so today will hopefully be better. For the love of god, please let it be better.

Now it’s time for the requisite cat story. My dad (who is not a cat) installed my new patio screen door on Sunday, and I LOVE it! The cats also love it. Every time I open it, the baby runs over there and sits there the whole evening looking out at the fascinating world. And talking to the bugs that land on the screen because she loves bugs. It’s so damn cute. The other story is how the Inspector has decided that he is going to sleep on my bed all night long, no matter what the cost. I’ve realized that once he makes that decision, he is COMMITTED to MAKING IT HAPPEN. And not only will he sleep on my bed, he will sleep there in such a way that he is touching me AT ALL TIMES. This is no easy task, as I move a lot when I sleep. But the moving and kicking don’t deter him – oh no! – I told you, he is committed. He is also committed to enthusiastically (and loudly) purring and licking my face every morning when he feels that it’s time for me to get up. It’s all very sweet, but also, since I’m not a morning person AT ALL and I try to stay in bed until the very last possible second – sometimes very annoying.

That’s pretty much it. My new favorite thing is “Extreme Makeover: Home Edition” because it has restored my faith in both humanity and reality television. I’ll forgive that ABC follows it with a shining example of what trash passes for a “hit show” these days (yes, “Desperate Housewives,” I’m talking to you) because Home Edition is so awesome. Real people who are true role models and examples of how everyone should be. A group of designers and cash and companies and volunteers who are generous with their time and resources because they recognize a fantastic cause when they see it. I have yet to make it through a show without crying. I don’t watch much reality tv because I think it sucks and is a forum for men to be dogs, women to be hos and people in general to show their true nature through backstabbing and greed while begging desperately for any sort of attention (yes, “The Bachelor” and “America’s Next Top Model,” I’m talking to you) but Home Edition is none of that. I would go so far as to say that, in my opinion, it is the best show on television right now. Yes, better than “CSI” and that’s saying a lot.

Oh, and speaking of the Autobahn, I also got a speeding ticket yesterday morning. Super.

Tuesday, May 03, 2005

If I get a roommate, will hijinks ensue?

You know, like on "Three's Company?" The reason I ask is because I’m thinking about getting a roommate. This may not be an earth-shattering decision for some, but for me, it’s definitely life changing. See how I can talk about something fairly pedestrian and still turn it into drama? It’s a gift…and a curse, as Monk says.

I’ve lived by myself now for nearly four years, and I’m not going to lie to you – I love it. I love the fact that the mess I leave in the morning will not have turned into a bigger mess by the time I get home – no extra dishes in the sink, no random clothes strewn across the floor. Barring the occasional sock that the cats drag around because they love socks. I love the fact that I can leave a mess and not feel bad about it. I love that I can leave my shoes wherever I want to and that I can take off my clothes and leave them wherever I took them off. Sometimes I’m a big slob, I admit it. I like that the only reason that there aren’t any eggs left is because I ate the last one and forgot to buy more. I can watch whatever I want to on tv (VERY important) and if I want to go to bed at 9, I can and it’s dark and quiet in the house. I could seriously go on for days about what I love about living alone, but I think you get the point.

The upside to a roommate is that I would have someone to talk to other than the cats. The downside is that sometimes I don’t like to talk. Oh shut up, there are so times like that! The upside is that I would have extra income and someone to split the monthly expenses with. The downside would be that I would have to share. Sometimes I don’t like to share.

To be honest, I’m pretty wary of having a roommate, ever since the Roommate Debacle of ’01 in which my seemingly responsible roommate turned out to be a total flake and the upshot of THAT story is that she got evicted after we lived there for, oh, two months and she also owes me $1,100 – which I know I will never ever see. She's the reason I started living alone in the first place. So you can understand why I’m a bit gun shy.

Kendra says that I would hate having a roommate because I’ve lived alone for so long. And that’s my fear – both that I would hate having a roommate, and that I’ve lived alone for too long. I don’t want to live alone forever – I certainly don’t plan on doing that, but frankly, with the way things have been going, it’s a distinct possibility. I don’t want to turn into some eccentric spinster who is no fun at all. I know someone who is just like that – she lives downstairs and I call her “Crazy Neighbor” because she IS a little bit crazy and she is very eccentric (but very nice) and has lived alone for a long time. Ack. Whenever I think about it, I think about the girl in “Say Anything” singing her angry song: “That’ll NEVER be me, that’ll NEVER be me, that’ll never NEVER be me – nooo. NEVER. EVER. No never ever ever – don’t you ever think it!” And then it is her when she talks to Joe. Sigh.

Oh, and the reason I was thinking of getting a roommate is because I’m trying to find a new job. Strangely enough, jobs in the “Non-Profit” sector are also notorious for not paying worth crap. I guess that’s what I get for trying to be a do-gooder. Anyway, if I want to find another job, chances are I might have to take a pay cut and I’d like to continue living comfortably without the stress of worrying about making the mortgage. Wow. Isn’t growing up FUN?