Thursday, April 06, 2006

The fashion police go shopping

I’m not known for my stunning sense of fashion. Unless fashion is somehow defined by the number of black pants, jeans and pajama bottoms a person owns. If that’s the case, then I’m a freakin’ fashion GENIUS. Otherwise, not so much. However, I AM an expert on what OTHER people are wearing -- and why they shouldn't be wearing it. Because I'm perfect like that, therefore I have room to talk. What? Stop laughing.

I wear a lot of black. I just like it. I also go to the other extreme and wear a lot of pink. I think I’m making up for my years of refusing to wear pink, despite my mother’s pleas for me to “wear something feminine”. She also likes me to wear makeup and do my hair, but we can’t always get what we want, right mom? Anyway. I think you could call me a conservative dresser – my favorite store is Ann Taylor. So I’ve branched out a little from Old Navy t-shirts and whatnot, but for the most part? I’m super boring.

This has to change for the trip to Vegas. I can’t walk into Ghost Bar in a cute little cardigan and matching shell. Because I'm not a soccer mom and it isn't casual Friday in corporate America. I’m not sure that Pure would appreciate my jeans and black t-shirt. Plus, it’ll probably be too hot to wear a cardigan and definitely too hot for jeans and a long sleeve t-shirt. Sometimes I amaze myself with my deductive reasoning skills...

SO. In order not to step TOO far out of my comfort zone all at once (baby steps and all that), today I went to White House/Black Market. Never been there before. It’s one door down from Ann Taylor, which is probably why. Once I leave AT, I don’t have any money, so what’s the use of going to the next store? However, today I was with Karen, and she wouldn’t let me go into Ann Taylor, as she said she didn’t think our cute Vegas tops were going to be in there. I wanted to look, you know, just to be safe, but she said no. Fine.

White House/Black Market had a very helpful salesgirl who kept bringing me stuff to try on. Most of it was way too hip for me to pull off. I just can’t get on board with gaucho pants. I don’t wear belts. I don’t like to wear skirts that go below my knees. Things like that. I’ll step out of the box, but I’m skittish – don’t scare me away with your fancy hoopy chain belt thingy. No sudden moves, ok?

Anyway, $200 later, I had some cute things to go with the plethora of cropped black pants that I own. Four black tops and one white one – I told you, we’d work up to other colors eventually. Plus they only had black and white stuff in the store. It's not just a clever name. AND, we’re only in Vegas for three nights. But a girl’s gotta be prepared, right? That’s why I also bought three new pairs of shoes. There’s no such thing as being TOO prepared in the footwear department.

Next stop? Accessories. Here’s where we try to step out of the silver-only box into something a bit more colorful and fashiony. Or something. God help me. And whoever goes shopping with me.

18 comments:

anna said...

take me along next time ill be more than happy to help:)

Sandra Dee said...

I LOVE White House/Black Market! Everything there is just so classic.

dasi said...

Thankfully, I live too far away to shop with you. I think I am even worse than you are. And it doesn't help that I am probably one of the few women in the entire world that HATES shopping, period.

C. said...

I just bought a Member's Only jacket and some parachute pants.. : ) Do you think the fashion police are gonna stop me?? :)


C.

Sass said...

Vegas = shopping, drunken stories, men, dancing and forgetting it all on the return.

Vegas? What vegas? I can't wait to see all the fabulous photos of you on your return.

Whinger said...

Great. Now I'm going to be the only soccer mom.

Shoot.

Leesa said...

I like Petite Sophisticate myself, but now that I think of it, I can't remember the last time I was in one of their stores.

Cheryl said...

I've always wanted to try that store. Congrat on your purchases. And good luck with the jewelry. Try to stear clear of gold too.

Mr. Fabulous said...

No, take ME along. I have am uncanny sense about women's fashions. I know what looks good on them. That fact has been a closely guarded secret.

Until now.

Alice said...

good places for fun (and cheap! so if you only wear it when you're doing Crazy Fashion Amber in vegas, no guilt): target. and forever 21. ok, stop laughing. i'm serious. those are 2 of the best places EVER for disposable accessories. fun! bright! shiny! CHEAP! all my favorite things ;-)

Jill said...

Oh! I wish wish wish wish wish that I could be there to go shopping with you!

K said...

I love White House/Black Market. My first work outfit was bought there.

Hooray for going to Vegas!!!

liberalbanana said...

I would love to shop at WH/BM but it's too damn expensive. Point me in the direction of Kohl's or H & M and I'm off! But the great thing about wearing white and black is that you can spice it up with colorful accessories. You really can't go wrong. Get some fun shoes and purses if you're scared about crazy jewelry...You'll look fabulous, trust me!

The Husband said...

hope you have fun in vegas...i want a full report when you get back!

The Husband said...

"i wanna know what love is...i want you to show me"

Hope said...

When ARE you going to Vegas? I just got back last night, and let me tell you I am EXHAUSTED! But honestly, I'm a pretty conservative dresser too, and even I felt the need to take a few tiny fashion risks in Vegas. I heard that at Pure, in order to get a private table you have to buy a bottle of liquor minimum and the cheapest shit they got is like $300. But that's how you roll, right Amber? You're a baller!

Kyahgirl said...

see, when I read this black pants, jeans and pajama bottoms I thought, "crikey-that girl needs to buy some tops before she goes to Vegas or she's going to have very burnt norks"

so glad that karen got you straightened away Amber...
have fun!

mal said...

Gauchos? smart move staying away from them. They may be the latest fashion "trend" but I don't think most people look good in them.

On the other hand, shopping for me is easy,,,,I am a "soccer mom" *L*