I am thrilled to be home. I really missed my boyfriend (yep, I’m THAT girl) and my little people. That is inclusive of both Chris’ girls and my cats. Chris ever so sweetly volunteered to leave me alone at my house on Saturday when I returned from Montana, knowing that I am a person who needs quiet time alone like some people need air.
My parents were supposed to pick me up from church when we got back, and instead, left my car and car key with one of the parents waiting for their children, because there was some sort of pressing engagement across town that my mom and dad had to go to. Like Bass Pro Shop. Anyway, I realized as I was driving home that while I had a car key, I had no house key. So I went to my parents’ house (I can get in THERE because I know the garage code) and called my dad’s cell from there. The conversation was wholly unproductive and also managed to turn me into a small child.
“Hey dad – maybe you guys could have left me a house key”
“Did you TELL your mom that she should leave you a house key?”
“Well, considering that the car key she gave me was off of my keychain AT MY HOUSE, I guess I figured she’d go ahead and do that.”
“Well, you’ll just have to wait until we get home”
“Well when will that be?”
“About an hour and a half. We’re going to have lunch.”
“But I want to go hooooooooome!”
“Maybe you should just take a nap”
“But I’m all dirty and sweaaaaaaatyyyyyy!”
“We have showers at our house”
“But I don’t have any clean clooooooooothes!”
“Too bad. You’ll just have to wait.”
I was pretty mad at my dad. So I thought to myself “maybe I WILL take a nap. On HIS side of the bed with my FEET on his PILLOW.” Because being at camp creates the absolute dirtiest feet ever, and the daily shower seemed to not do anything noticeable to fix that. Plus, there were no showers to be taken Saturday morning because we all wanted to get on the road. No showers+14 people in the van+95 degrees+I'm really tired= angry crying dirty person.
Anyway. I decided against that because I’m 31, not 10. Instead, I handled it like a mature 13 year old and when my parents got home (two hours later) I gave them dirty looks, didn’t say a word to either of them, and stalked angrily out of the house. Because I am nothing if not good at projecting righteous anger. Or something. Did I ever mention that I was an only child for a long time and sometimes the spoiled princess makes a surprise appearance?
Luckily, I got home, went straight to the shower and scrubbed my disgusting feet and took a nap. In clean clothes. And then, all was right with the world. Because I had a Corona with dinner.