Friday, March 28, 2008

Death rides a scooter, apparently

I'll bet you wanted an update on the dead guy in the yard, didn't you? Ok! I'm just going to say up front that while I sympathize with his family, I think he's an idiot and maybe could be the recipient of one of those Darwin awards? Here's why - we get our little town newspaper twice a week, and Chris found the article about the dead guy in the yard. As it turns out, I reported a few inaccuracies, which I will now remedy. One, he wasn't in his 20s, he was actually 45. Old enough to know better than to ride around helmetless. And wearing socks with sandals - not appropriate riding gear and as a matter of fact not appropriate ever. Two, he wasn't riding a crotch rocket, he was riding a scooter. A SCOOTER. The article said he "failed to navigate a turn", which, ok, but what turn? We live on a hill that curves, but by no stretch is it a "turn". After the failed turn navigating, he fell off the scooter and hit his face on the bumper of a parked car (the one in the neighbor's driveway) and died.

I was wondering if in the scheme of things, there is a less graceful way to go out than losing control of A SCOOTER on a SLIGHT CURVE in a NEIGHBORHOOD and hitting a PARKED CAR with your head. The article mentioned that it was unknown whether there were drugs or alcohol involved. I realize I'm no medical examiner, nevertheless I'm going to say there probably were. Otherwise, he's just a sober idiot who can't drive A SCOOTER. I'm sorry, I kind of just want to laugh. Maybe I'm heartless and unfeeling, but really. A SCOOTER?

7 comments:

Woodrow said...

That IS hilarious! What a loser. He definitely deserved to die.

-J said...

I had a friend who rented scooters to folks in Key West and they had to give them safety classes and ask them to wear helmets but pretty much no one ever listened because c'mon, it's a scooter. Well, I will tell you that a lot of people fell off those things all the darn time. I do not think anyone ever died on his shifts, though.

Edge said...

If you knew that's how you were going to go out of this life, would you have still bought the scooter?

I do feel for his family as well, but I'm glad the gene pool has been thinned. I only wish it had been a little sooner.

Some people's kids ...


~Jef

Claire said...

I feel for the family, but seriously - no helmet?????

Cxx

Alice said...

that's a pretty embarrassing way to go... dang.

Cheryl said...

wow...i just...wow.

willikat said...

i admit it.i laughed out loud. and that makes me a terrible person.