I have the most massive case of writer's block EVER. Seriously. I've started about a brazillion posts and I can never get the words out that I want to.
I have tons of thoughts going through my head -- in fact, that's pretty much why I've barely slept for a week. It's gotten so I kind of dread going to bed, because I know I'm just going to wake up in the middle of the night and have a hard time going back to sleep. This is completely unlike me, as I love to sleep. I love it so very much. I wish my brain would remember that and shut the hell up.
I think part of the problem is that recently, I've had a hard time thinking of the right thing to say. Last week was rough, and for the first time ever, I found myself at a true loss for words. It's frustrating, especially when you want so badly to say something, but nothing comes to mind that is remotely helpful.
Every once in a while, I go through phases where I feel quiet. I don't have a lot to say because I've got other stuff on my mind. Not bad stuff necessarily, just stuff. People always assume I'm upset, because my mouth isn't going a mile a minute, but I'm not. I just feel quiet. That could be a part of the block as well.
As for the job situation, they're keeping me until November 19, which is the end of the fiscal year, and then they'll revisit it and make a decision. Oh good. That means another two weeks of stress over whether I'm going to be unemployed. This is also contributing to my lack of sleep.
All of that being said, I will say this. No matter what happens, I know that I have people in my life that love me, and that is more important than anything else. People who take good care of me, think about me, and make sure I know that I'm loved. I know things will work out -- I just have to trust that and keep moving forward.