Thursday, November 02, 2006

Auuggggaaaaahhhh!! You know, for lack of a better title.

So I can’t remember if I told you this when I got my new job, but I’m a contractor. This is great in many ways, because my schedule is really flexible and when I work lots of hours, I get paid for lots of hours, instead of a flat salary. This is bad, because if there’s nothing for me to do, I don’t get paid and also I don’t get benefits. The worst part is that I’m easily expendable.

On Monday, the big boss of the office got the boot and was replaced by another guy in our office. So this week has been sort of interesting as people start to adjust and all that. The question is, will the new boss get rid of people who are expendable? You know, like me?

At first I wasn’t that concerned, because I heard that they were still lobbying to not only keep me, but also to hire me permanently. Then I was talking to my co-worker/supervisor this morning and she was saying that stuff is starting to slow down and that maybe there wasn’t enough work to justify having me. And even though we had talked about me learning some other skills, THAT’S not a sure thing either now. Apparently they’re going to talk about me on Monday when they have their weekly management meeting.

Monday. So that’s another four days for me to freak out. Because, yes, maybe I’m freaking out a little bit. I’m not sure if the situation justifies tears yet, but believe me, they’re waiting in the wings for their cue to come spilling out. Because as we’ve discussed previously, a) I’m a baby and b) tears are how I express pretty much every emotion. Anyway.

The reasons that this possible job-losing sucks are many. Besides the whole “not working” thing, I mean. Seriously, I had four months off and by the end, I was getting pretty bored. I don’t want to not work again. I never thought I’d hear myself say that I’m tired of not working, but I am. Secondly, I love my job. I love what I do and the people I work with are cool and I like going to work every morning. And thirdly, my first concern is always paying my mortgage. The extraneous stuff is no big deal – I could give up some of that stuff, but I don’t want to give up my house. I love my house. I always have the option of getting a roommate, but there’s also the fear of finding someone who’s not a psycho, since I had that one bad roommate situation back in the day. Plus, no one likes living with strangers. Gah. And Ack.

Anyway, I’m going to sit here and try to think about something else so that I can at least get through this day without worrying myself into, um, I don’t know , more worry? The good thing is, you’d never KNOW I was freaking out. Because outwardly, I'm pretty much my usual self. Unless you happened to maybe wander into my house later this evening and I’m face down on the floor, bawling. Not that that would happen. And not that most of you know where I live. And I certainly don't leave my front door unlocked. But that's neither here nor there. I’m just sayin’. Hypothetically.

17 comments:

dasi said...

They'll HAVE to keep you. Because you are a wonderful person and probably work really hard, too! as far as distractions - I suggest vodka. And friends. And maybe some "Arrested Development." ;) OR - you can just keep going to MY blog and looking at the CUTE KOALA BEAR!!! Yes!!! THAT is always a guaranteed smile!!!

Edge said...

Sorry to hear they might cut you but they might keep you. After I left the evil insurance empire I always looked over my shoulder and kept the resume current. I tried to get in teh habit of interviewing once a year. I was bad at keeping contact names. The name of the game is to get income as fast as you can if you are out of work. Don't wait around, get out and flip burgers while you look. Anything to pay the bills.

Just be prepared. If anything I learned it all comes and goes.

Good luck, you'll land on your feet.

~Jef

The Husband said...

i hope you are able to keep your job.

Linda said...

Sadly I live too far away to show up at your door tonight, because I DO know where you live and I DO know how you worry yourself into a coma on occassion...but if I could, I'd be over there with, oh, I don't know, champagne?? You could always go back and work for Pam.....aaaaaaaaarrrrrrgh!

Nocturnal said...

Contracting = getting payed $$$ to fulfill deadlines not capable in-house. Been there, done that. If you prefer fire to smoke, it's a good call. I always enjoyed it.

Good luck over there.

Cheers

Mr. Fabulous said...

I thought this was a lovely title.

I hope it all goes well. I will be thinking of you.

How could they NOT want to keep you? You seem like a person who would be the ideal employee.

I'll make some calls.

Spaceman Spiff said...

Whatever you do, do not sleep with the boss to try and keep your job (not that I think you would, I'm just saying). That is a sure way to keep your job for the next 6 months, but you won't get a raise, and the work environment will go to heck in a handbasket. Eventually, you will become frustrated to the point of near homicide and you will explode at work and kick the crap out of the other moronic superviso that you didn't sleep with for some stupid comment that borders on sxual harrassment. You might get a decent settlement out of it, but it really isn't worth the trouble. Just ask my last 4 secretaries, after we slept together it was hard to work in the same office. "Work" was easy enough, but you don't pay yhe bills unless you do actual work. . . . . . I guess the secretary still paid the bills. . . . . so nevermind.

Oh, and that whole part about me and the past 4 secretaries, utter fabrication. I have never even had a secretary. I just thought it made an interesting twist.

Hope said...

But if somehow I was able to accidentally stumble into your house tonight I'd have vodka on hand, and then I'd probably plant my face in the floor and cry right along with you. Oh, job woes!

When my best friend and I were jobless at the same time our back up plan was to move to Hollywood and for at least one of us to marry a movie star (or other rich guy), and then whoever got married would support the other one financially and we'd never work again. We'd spend the day lying on the beach and getting manicures on someone else's dime. Let me know if you're in. I could use a tan.

Cheryl said...

Hey now, no tears. Everything is going to be ok. Promise. How could they not keep you? They've met you, right? Done deal.

Marissa said...

agreed with cheryl on all counts!!!!!! they HAVE to keep you. and if not, then they're gonna miss out on the best person / worker ever. and you can tell 'em i said that!

Marissa said...

agreed with cheryl on all counts!!!!!! they HAVE to keep you. and if not, then they're gonna miss out on the best person / worker ever. and you can tell 'em i said that!

Chief Slacker said...

Yeah, I'm in the contractor boat right now... it definitely sucks hoping that it stays floating till tomorrow :O(

Johnny Menace said...

you look like a contracter......... in the nose only though

Dan said...

Well, I hope that you don't end up walking in my shoes, 'cause I kinda need them at the moment...

Cheryl said...

So? Any news?

Amanda said...

good luck - whatever happens it will be for the best. this job will take to you the next stop in your journey.

xo

Harley said...

Hey, just think, even when yopu are salaried, that still isn't even a guarantee. Another Dept in my company wants me, so today the manager asked me to apply for an inhouse job posting and take another guys job. Oh, and this is a guyh I see on a regular basis and occasionally work with.