Is it another sign that I’m getting old if when we were walking home from the Avalanche game on Sunday in the freezing cold and snow, I wanted to smack a few people in the head because they had their children with them? Children in no coats or sans hats/hoods? WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU PEOPLE??
On Saturday night after we got home from dinner, P.I.C., C and I were sitting in front of the fireplace, and, during a moment of silence, C started singing. “Ground control to Major Tom…hey, you know? That would be a really difficult song to strip to.”
Is it wrong that I’m going to be 30 one month from tomorrow and I got inordinately excited when I heard “The Thong Song” in the restaurant the other night? Does it make me old or nostalgic or does it simply mean I enjoy the one amusing song by the tiny gay boy with platinum hair? P.I.C. thought I should stand up on the booth and dance, but I declined, as I hadn’t had nearly enough to drink to make THAT seem like a good idea.
I’ve decided it might be a good idea for me to take more pictures. Pictures of my adventures (although I’m not sure how many pictures you’d want to see of me SLEEPING, since apparently that’s all I do) and pictures of people I see. Like the girl at dinner on Saturday. I swear it was a chick. P.I.C. said it was a guy. C couldn’t really get a good look without making a spectacle of himself. The conversation continued and I could only half-listen because I couldn’t stop staring at the girl/guy. I was watching for mannerisms and breasts and I got nothin’, although at least she (or he) never realized I was staring. Also, I could have taken a picture of this guy at the Avs game in a fur coat and very pointy fawn-colored cowboy boots. Wow. I saw him again later and he’d taken off his luxurious fur, revealing a very tight short-sleeved pink and red and white striped polyester shirt. Huh. I want to believe that the ensemble was the result of him losing a bet or something, but I have a feeling he just likes to dress like that on purpose.
Speaking of staring, on Friday night when we were at the bar, I looked over and this old guy was apparently trying to bore a hole in my head with his eyes. And usually when you catch someone staring at you, they look away. Oh no, not this guy. He just stared and smirked and so I gave him the raised eyebrow “WTF?” look and looked away. Creep. And because P.I.C. and I like to eavesdrop on people, we were listening to the smarmy guy at the table next to us hit on this girl. So sad. It was one of those situations where he was not good looking and tactless, while his friend was totally cute but had some modicum of class because he didn’t start running game on the girl a split second after she sat down. Once the friends she was meeting joined her, Tactless McSmarm looked over at me and gave me this “how YOU doin’” look, to which I responded with the raised eyebrow “WTF?” look and went back to my wine. It’s an all-purpose look, I tell you. Also, if I’m ever the girl who goes to the bar alone and spends the evening playing Tetris at the end of the bar, please…well, do SOMETHING. I don’t want to be that girl.
Aaaaaand...end scene.
12 comments:
i personally have several "if i ever [do/say/wear X], do something / slap me / kill me" instructions out to trusted friends. some of those include "get the horrifying mullet-thing our old boss used to have" and "wear jeans that are SO OBVIOUSLY about 4 sizes too small." that's what friends are for, yes? :-)
ps - also have this pesky getting-old-penchant-for-sleeping deal. am depressed about it. i hardly even get slobbering drunk anymore these days, because the hangovers don't seem worth it. WHO AM I??
Tetris is meant for home. HOME.
As are all video games unless you're a 14-year-old.
Aw, I wouldn't want to be that girl either. Sounds like in addition to sleep weekend it was a "WTF" weekend.
I love eavesdropping. I also love Tetris. But. At home. I get it. At home.
1. I sleep all the time and I don't party like I used too either, so apparently any age is old if you think yourself that way.
2. More pictures would be great. 2a. Depends on what you wear when you sleep (I figured I'd throw a comment in for the fellas).
2b. Is it possible to get a picture of the "WTF" look. That would be outstanding!! I need help with mine so I figured maybe I'd copy.
ok, this is weird, word verification = wtfizuyt not sure what that stands for, but it had wtf in if and iz u
my "euthanasia is authorized" condition is wearing dark dress socks with shorts and any sort of shoe outside the house.
it is written on the back of my license.
my kids know it.
what's worse is that i even considered it once 2 summers ago - one evening i thought, i don't want to dirty a pair of socks just to mow the lawn...internal bitch slap and i was over it. but still...
Hey, if you can't TAKE pictures, you can always DRAW some!! I mean, it's just a thought...
I actually love to sleep now. And I was actually ashamed of it until I read your last post. Thanks!
"Tactless McSmarm" ~ ha! Good one.
Sleeping is great!
I promise (as I too am nearing 30) that I will keep close tabs on you and at the moment of mention of you sitting AT A BAR playing tetris will proceed to mock you and make refrence to this post.
Deal.
Ok then
Hey, Tetris is a perfectly entertaining product. I wouldn't play at a bar, but while waiting for a doctor or other dull, meaningless idle time, why not? Like reading some magazine is SO sophisticated and adult.
I'd also like my friends to do something if I ever become Tactless McSmarm. I mean the not-good-looking thing won't be a problem (obviously*), but I might lose my sense of tact after a few drinks.
*sarcasm
Happy early birthday, Amber!
At least tax day isn't as dreadful for you because it's also your birthday!
I'll be 30 this year, too, so I guess I'll be seeing you in the 30s club. Which, of course, has a much earlier closing time than the clubs we frequented in our 20s.
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