Sunday, June 12, 2005

I'm going to kick dating's ass -- unless it kicks mine first.

Ok, so I’m continuing with my recent streak of excellent luck in the dating game. With the last few guys, what usually happens is that I start seeing someone, and THEY start planning for all of the time we will be spending together in the future. I say THEY because usually it’s the girl who’s doing that, but I’ve learned that that’s not the route to go. However, if THEY do it, sometimes I go along with it, and sometimes I’m like “uh, ok.” Admittedly, sometimes I don’t make the best decisions when it comes to relationships. Anyway, this goes on for roughly two weeks, and then THEY freak out. “Oh my god!” THEY say “This is moving too fast!” Really? You’re just now figuring that out? And usually, I agree. I say this in a sarcastic tone because as you may know, hindsight is 20/20. AND because it deflects my actual feelings -- in real life, I like to use sarcasm and humor as a defense mechanism.

So let’s just say that hypothetically, the THEY in this situation is the firefighter. He had been talking a lot about spending time together in the future, and blah blah blah. While this made me happy, I was also pretty skeptical about it, considering my stellar track record over the past year or so. So I didn’t really believe him, but I went along with it, kinda hoping that maybe I’ve just become so jaded that I can’t let down my guard and he really DID mean it. Maybe he did, but I’m really glad I didn’t let my guard down very far. Because today he calls and says something to the effect of “not being ready for this” because “it’s moving pretty fast.” I told him that I agreed with that (which I did – in fact, I was working up the nerve to tell him that, but he saved me the trouble) and so I asked him straight up if he wanted us to stop seeing each other. He said he didn’t know – that it wasn’t something he could decide on quickly and he had to think about it. It was like a two minute phone call.


So ok. Being the optimist that I am, I’m sure he’ll decide NOT to keep seeing me. After overthinking it for most of the day, I decided that I’ll be ok with that eventually (and better by the minute, I’d like to think), even though I’d like to say at this juncture that I’m not sure I EVER WANT TO DATE AGAIN if this is how it’s going to keep being. Because I’m WAY over it.

7 comments:

beckibee said...

"I'm not ready for this"??? Yeah, I'm not ready to go out with a wonderful, beautiful, talented person who makes me laugh and I REALLY hate when I connect with that someone immediately. Idiot.

Kendra said...

Perhaps he was deprived of oxygen while fighting the last blaze and now has a brain injury. Clearly, the only explination!

Linda said...

I'm thinkin' it isn't DATING's ass that needs a good kicking, rather a particular firefighter who turned out like most men, too good to be true. And by the way, I'm wearing the pointy shoes when I get there to kick his ass.

Linda said...

...and Beckibee? I concur. Idiot.

Beth said...

Sigh. Boys are silly.

Cheryl said...

Ug, dating really is the worst. And those jerks on Sex and the City said guys don't have mixed messages. Whatever.

On another note, great blog. I too use sarcasm and humor as a defense mechanism.

JustD said...

I am having trouble. I like this woman a lot!!! LOT LOT!! But something has taken a turn..

Last night on the phone, after 1 blissfull weekends together.. and 3 weeks email and phone conversation. She was extremely sarcastic to me. To the point of critical.. I tried to play it off with little response, you know.. "welll I do make mistakes.." and I really have a lot of wisdom about some things..etc.

I am so sad today, it just goes to show it is not a good idea to all in love to fast.. if someone's only defense mechanism is sarcasm I just don't know..

Has she been hurt bad and is taking it out on me? She says she is only playing... but if she really does not like me then I have to bow out...

Sad...