Monday, December 12, 2005

Don't be jealous of my fabulous life

So I was eating dinner on Friday night, and since I generally never eat at the actual table, I was sitting on the couch. I had come home, sat down, taken off my favorite boots, and started eating my dinner. I had a little plastic dish of barbeque sauce sitting on the table and I’m not sure how it happened, but I hit the dish and it flipped in the air, landing sauce down IN MY BOOT. I grabbed it and put it aside, hoping that it hadn’t landed on the OUTSIDE of the boot, which is light tan suede, and at the same time totally laughing because I couldn’t believe that it actually ended up inside my boot. So now my right foot probably smells vaguely of barbeque sauce. I don’t actually know, as I don’t spend a lot of time smelling my feet.

After the sauce debacle, I went to Karen and John’s so that we could go get our Christmas trees. I did NOT go back to the original tree lot -- instead I got the most awesome tree ever at a different place. Every time I walk in my living room, I'm hit with a very strong pine scent. VERY STRONG. The best part was that John delivered it to my house on Saturday morning, set it up in the stand, and offered to come and get it after Christmas. Karen, we have the best husband EVER. I then spent upwards of two hours decorating it. Between finding an extra strand of lights and replacing some burned out ones, watching "Miami Vice," and then getting all the ornaments exactly where I wanted them? Well, it took a while. But the tree looks awesome. As did Rico Tubbs.

Yesterday I went and saw Elton John’s “Aida.” I’ve seen it before – in New York 3 years ago – and I loved it. The production we saw yesterday was so good. It takes place in Egypt, and so there were a lot of half naked men dancing around. Men with smokin’ hot bodies, who can dance and also sing? Merry Christmas to ME! Even though the chances are excellent that every last one of them were gay. Sigh. Anyway, it was great. I find that whenever I go to shows like that, I miss performing SO MUCH. I always loved it. I would still love to do shows. Double sigh.

Then last night, I went to my friend Trish’s going away party. We had to dress up as a t.v. or movie character, so Jeff and I dressed up as Charlie Brown and Linus from “A Charlie Brown Christmas.” Jeff had on a yellow shirt with the trademark zig zag, a winter hat with ear flaps, and he carried around a scrawny Christmas tree. I had on a red shirt and toted around a blue blankie. Trish is all about wine, which worked out well, as I am ALSO all about wine. Therefore, I drank a lot.

So let’s recap: barbeque boot, awesome tree, half-naked hotties, and wine. That, my friends, is a weekend I can get on board with.


Sandra said...

HA, I love the BBQ Boot story, why do gooey things always land on other things, often expensive things, face down???

Rico said...

All you need is some chicken nuggets in your gym shoes, and you have dinner to go and shoes for any occassion. What could be better?

Alice said...

that is extremely lucky about the sauce. in my world, it would have split itself nicely between white carpet + tan boots to ruin :-)

i had an xmas tree debacle weekend, which resulted in not only no tree, but no tree stand, and no nice smell, and dammit i want a treeeeeee... *wimper* tonight. tonight i get a tree OR ELSE.

Miladysa said...

Reads like a saucy weekend :)

Kris said...

Barbeque, half-naked, and Elton John really stuck with me here. I clearly need to read more carefully. :)

Glad you had a great weekend.

Edge said...

And then there are some me who find a woman's foot with the aroma of bbq sauce attractive. Google it and see if it's a fetish.


The Husband said...

i love bbq sauce. could eat it right out of the bottle...not that i would ever do such a thing.

Whinger said...

That is a serious waste of what is perhaps the MOST IMPORTANT CONDIMENT.

Shame on your boot.

Cheryl said...

I think I could definitely get on board with that too.

Hope said...

I wanted a tree, but Jeff didn't understand that it's possible to have a tree that's - GASP! - not fake! By the time he figured out that you could have a real live tree in your very own home it was too late. I'm jealous of your Christmas spirit. And you do so have a fabulous life!

The Other Half said...

oh i am sooooo jealous ;-)~

Bruce said...

My father had a dollop of dressing land in his shoe one Thanksgiving. Bad thing is, he didn't realize it until he took his shoe off and the dressing was stuck to his big toe.

Marissa said...

Oh man, that whole boot/sauce debacle is SO something that would happen to me. Yesterday I spilled yogurt and granola all over my shag rug. It is NOT easy to get anything out of a shag rug, let alone goopy yogurt. Ew. I have a feeling the roaches are on their way to clean up the leftovers.

Jill said...

Barbecue sauce. Christmas tree. Half-naked hotties. Wine. Where do I sign up?

Romeo Jensen said...

ummmm ummmmm where to start? wheeeeere to start?

I know guys on 5th avenue here in pittsburgh that will glady smell your feet for you

seriously... they'd even pay ya!

christmas trees... its a girl thing

hot gay dancers??? ummmm
is that like visons of sugar plums... I dont know and I dont want to... gay... hawt... and dancers are not in the official romey vocabulary... keep this up ambo and ur headed for britney spearsville... how do you think she ended up with kevin???

Marie said...

Nice. I'd love to see Aida and of course, hottie dancers.

I'm jealous that you have your tree! I love the smell of pine.

The BBQ sauce incident is just too classic. hehe

C. said...

Ummmmmm Barbeque flavored toe jam... Yummy..Sounds like you had a very interesting weekend indeed..
Now would that be Bullseye or K.C. Masterpiece in the boot? I'll bring a brisket over and we can have chopped beef barbeque straight from Texas as we listen to Elton John singing Tiny Dancer.:)


Stephanie said...

hahahahaha Amber you never cease to make me laugh with your consitently random happenings.

Seriously. Where are the pics of the costumes? Now THAT would be a sight to see!

Amanda said...

that barbeque story is something that would totally happen to me, as well. usually i drop stuff, crumbs usually, down my shirt. AND, i am a sit-on-the-couch eater, too.

FigEqualsGood said...

Was it Sweet Baby Ray's BBW Sauce? That stuff is good eating!

Kyahgirl said...

sounds like a great weekend. do you suppose your boot will smell like BBQ sauce for the rest of its natural life?

Thomas said...

Don't be jealous that I am leaving the best comment, y'all.

Romeo Jensen said...

do you ACTUALLY think in 5 months Im gunna stop flirting with you???

ha ha


ha ha ha


I think not!

ha ha ha hahahahahahahaha


Romeo Jensen said...

to answer this comment:

Now there you go again talking about the babes in their 30s with "mileage." Do I need to remind you again that in 5 short months I'll be pushing the mileage of the 30s? Romey, I'm beginning to get a complex here...

babydoll... dont you know I do that just to pick on ya LOL seriously... there isnt a woman in the world that wouldnt give their left nut.... let me rephrase this... there isnt a woman in the world that wouldnt give everything they have JUST to look as good as you do!!! Then... THEN!!! Then you go and be as funny... witty and intelligent as you are... its sooooo unfair... you realize there is a zero sum gain so obviousley some poor woman is walking around out there sans all your fantastic qualities!!!

am I good or what?

anyway... lol yeah babe... sorry but I do that just for you so when u do see those remarks... I want you to know that Im thinking of you and smiling

romey <~~ seven years from
the big 3-ohhhh