Monday, December 26, 2005

I'm reasonably certain that hijinks ensued

I say reasonably certain because I did have a lot of wine. Just kidding. I totally remember everything. Mostly. JUST KIDDING.

It’s hard to put into words (especially FUNNY words) the festivities of the weekend. Mainly because most of the fun came from laughing about stuff that if I wrote it here, you would sit there in dead silence, crickets chirping, not getting the joke at all.

Friday night was spent at the Hot Tub House, at their annual party. It was cool because their daughters Jacque and Nicole were there – we grew up together. In fact, Jacque and I started 1st grade together and have been friends ever since. So I guess you could say we have a history. Ian was with us as well, and so the four of us ended up drinking a lot more than we meant to. The original plan was for us to go out downtown with Jeff and his brother, however, when he called, Jeff was treated to Jacque and I giggling uncontrollably and not making a lot of sense. Shocking. But part of it was because for some reason Ian was outside with his shirt off, pressing his chest up against the window in front of us. The reason behind that is still unclear, but I’ll wager it had something to do with the copious amounts of Corona he’d been drinking. Bottom line is, we decided to stay home, since hey, the alcohol was free and also you can’t get a DUI in your kitchen. I think this was a good plan, since none of us lasted much longer than 11:00.
What I learned: “Bitch” is my new favorite term of endearment. We rarely called each other by our names all night.
What I heard: After hearing a really funny (to us) quote, I asked Ian “what was that quote just now?” And he said “Ummmm, I was going to say ‘coo coo ca choo’ but I know that’s totally not it.” I’m going to go out on a limb and agree.

Saturday was pretty mellow. Did some stuff around the house, did one last Christmas errand, and had dinner with my family. Then I went home and did a ton of baking – lemon cookies and a chocolate Kahlua cake and a green chile casserole. The last two things were for dinner at Sally and Joe’s the next night, and the cookies were part of the holiday baking extravaganza of ’05. I made them for my neighbors. Anyway. In the meantime, my brother came over and got his present – I guess I don’t have to tell you that he loved it. Awesome.

Sunday. I went to church and sang for the service. I had taken a Claritin the night before so I wouldn’t be stuffed up, which was great. The unfortunate side effect was that my mouth was SO DRY. I got through my first song ok – not my best, but whatever. It was fine. I was sitting up on the altar with the pastor and I had a bottle of water, but I knew I had to have some gum. My mom and dad were sitting off to the side, and so I got my mom’s attention and was like “I need gum.” She’s one of those moms who always has gum. She stealthed it up to me – vocal tragedy: averted. In fact, the second song I did went so well that there were people in the audience bawling (and no, smarties, not because I sucked. I swear). I got a lot of compliments, which was cool. It never ceases to amaze me that I’ve been going to the same church since I was born and I’ve sung about 8 million times, and people still say “I had no idea you had such a beautiful voice.” It makes me wonder whether I just suck every other time and they’re constantly surprised, or just don’t pay attention. Who knows. After church was presents at my parents’ (and yes, I DID get my coveted digital camera – YAY!!) and then lunch.

Early evening, I went to Sally and Joe’s for an evening of drinking and dinner and laughing. Jacque and Nicole were there again, as were their parents, Joe’s brother Chris, the next door neighbors (Anita and Ned), and Cass and Ian. We had an amazing dinner and everyone essentially ate themselves into a near coma. I say near coma, because the coma didn't kick in until, oh, an hour. Then almost everyone basically called it a night. I think it may have been around 9. Joe and Chris and Ian and Cass and I started watching “The Big Lebowski” and I think I probably saw the first 30 minutes before falling asleep. I’m certain I made it longer than the other four people on the couch. I woke up around 1:30 and went home. It was one of our more mellow Christmases, but I would like to point out that even though I fell asleep, I managed to live up to my resolution from last year -- “No passing out in ’05!” – since last year I was maintaining pretty well, sitting in a chair looking at a book, and then the next thing I remember is when I woke up on the couch at 5 the next morning, wishing I could just die. This year no one had to carry me anywhere and I didn't even feel remotely like dying. Everybody wins!
What I learned: Ginormous crab legs can be hazardous to you. I was having some difficulty getting the meat out of the leg, and those suckers have sharp pointy things on them that hurt my girly hands. Also, FYI, if someone is walking toward you with an armful of frozen legs, make sure you leave enough room to pass each other. Because those things hurt when the sword-like tips of the legs stab into your upper arm. I’m not going to lie – it hurt.
What I heard: Laughing. There was a lot of inappropriateness (which is the usual for us) and a lot of playing off each other in the way that people who have spent a lot of years together can do. And before I fell asleep, I also heard the lines that made me remember how much I LOVE “The Big Lebowski.”

Which brings me to today, most of which I spent on the couch. I actually did some cleaning up, but for the most part, couch. I plan on painting my bedroom this week and basically getting stuff done that I haven’t had a chance to do. I have great aspirations of getting a lot of stuff done, but those goals may be usurped by my penchant for naps. Mmmmmmm. Naps.


Miladysa said...

Sounds like you had a fantastic time! So pleased Father Christmas remembered the digital camera :)

Barry S. said...

Where are all the pictures you managed to take with your new camera?

"The Big Lebowski" is a great movie.

The Dude

Whinger said...

Love the lovely naps.
Glad it was a happy Christmas. :)

Kiki said...

That sounds like so much fun!! I know what you mean about the inside joke hilarity that if you wrote on here, no one would understand.

Story of my life.

I guess I never knew you sang. Maybe you should create an audiopost?

C. said...

Sounds like you had a blast Ambs...Sounds like we both have some cool family and friends... :)
Welcome Back to the world of Blog!

Yours Truly
Hook Em' C.

Marie said...

That sounds like a fantastic time! I'm so happy to hear it. And I also love to call only my closest girl friends "bitch" or "skank" as a term of endearment. :) too funny. Have a great week getting all of that stuff done!

Jill said...


Cheryl said...

I too have many plans for the week that have already gone out the window. Sounds like a good weekend. Have a nice nap or 12.

Kyahgirl said...

what a great Christmas Amber. :-)

All the best in 2006-and no passing out!!!

The Zombie Lama said...


Sounds like you had a great time

Paul said...

Sounds like one hell of a weekend! Happy New Year to you, as well.

And, more crab legs for everyone!!

trish said...

Smash them crabbies with a hammer!

The Other Half said...

so glad you had a good one!!!

lil'bitty said...

MMMMMMM . . . naps! I so love the naps. But I hate to fall asleep and miss something. Is that weird?

C. said...

Amber, hope you are having a great day! I had to move my blog address, just fyi.. I feel like wendi now:) except I would have to move it a few more times to catch up, lol....


Hope said...

sounds like you had a fabulous weekend! merry belated christmas!

HMT said...

yes, in the NOW.. so NOW

The Husband said...

hi amber!

Sass said...

Your either
A. hitting the bottle again
B. Can't reach the bottle b/c alcohol impairs vision
C. Napping
D. Ran off with a christmas elf
E. to busy reading other blogs to blog

Please tell me it's not D but if it is D, we want details and photos.

Whinger said...

Whiny enough for you?
Entertain me, please.