Tuesday, January 03, 2006

Pre-New Year's Eve Party by the numbers

Every year at Christmas, we have our Annual A-List Christmas Party. We began the tradition in college, and our first party consisted of drinking Boone’s Farm while we made “Man Cookies.” We made gingerbread men and decorated them like the boy who most recently wronged us, and then we ate them. Therapeutic AND delicious! We’ve gone out to dinner and dancing and drinking any number of times, and now usually Kendra hosts and we go to Jordano or make dinner ourselves. This year, Kendra cooked out of her new Rachael Ray cookbook, and the rest of us provided the side dishes. So I now present to you a rundown of our evening – in numbers.

Number of the A-List members present and accounted for -- 4

The Food and Drink Part:
Number of bottles of red wine consumed2 (and one was the biggie sized kind)

Number of bottles of white wine consumed1 (I did that all by myself!)

Number of “appetizers” that were a throwback to our high school days3 (sun chips, cheese dip and twizzlers – YUM!!!)

Number of times we said “I’m SO FULL” and then kept eating250

Number of delicious ingredients that comprised Kendra’s culinary masterpiece7

The Inside Jokes Part:
Number of references to one time when things between Becki and I got “wheird”at least 5

Number of references to “Wayne’s World”85

Number of references to parties of debauchery at Karen’s parents’ house25

Number of times we said things to each other that no outsider would be able to understand946

The Music Part:
Number of songs on the “A-List Greatest Hits 1993-1999” compilation cd so awesomely put together by Becki and Beth -- 19

Number of times we listened to it all the way through that evening2

Number of times Becki and I stopped in the middle of a conversation to say our favorite parts from “Slam” by Onyx, much to the annoyance of Kendra and Karen12

Number of times Becki and I performed a dramatic interpretation of Air Supply’s “Making Love out of Nothing at All”3

Number of times we did the above while Karen recorded it on her new camcorder1

Number of times you will see that0

The Evening Outing Part:
Number of miles we drove to go to a VERY SPECIAL store for our semi-annual visit5

Number of items purchased there5

Number of times the lady working at Walgreens told us we should get a life since it was Friday night and we were at Walgreensat least 3

Number of times we thought to ourselves “We need lives? You work at Walgreens.”at least 3 (especially after she told us the story of her last DUI. Super. Please just ring up our ice cream.)

The Helmet Voice Part:
Number of minutes in which I broke out the patented “helmet voice”about 10

Number of people we made fun of during that time2

Number of minutes we spent laughing hysterically about what I saidat least 20

Number of chances that we’re not going straight to hell because of that – 0

Number of us who would say it was totally worth it

And that, my friends, ends the post that no one will think is nearly as funny as we do. Because sometimes? You totally have to be there. And in this case, you would have totally had to be there for the past 16 or so years. You might say that this post? Is for Members Only.


Sandra said...

Girls nights are the best. After too much wine I tend to overquote "So I Married An Axe Murderer"...you do "Wayne's World." Pretty fun.

Kendra said...

I don't mean to correct any of your numbers, but while I was cleaning up the next morning, I found 4 bottles of wine and the bottle of champagne. And one of the bottles of wine was 1.5 litres which I'd started by myself as I was cooking. Because I'm a lush, evidently.
Also, when we got to hell, I'm certain we'll get the party room!

Miladysa said...

ROFLMAO!!! I loved this post!

My favourite quote?

"Number of times Becki and I performed a dramatic interpretation of Air Supply’s “Making Love out of Nothing at All” – 3

Number of times we did the above while Karen recorded it on her new camcorder – 1

Number of times you will see that – 0 "

Go on - show it!! Please, please :)

Whinger said...

That video is so going to get out if you become famous. I haven't done an Air Supply reenactment in a LONG time.

SO sorry I missed it. Stupid living far away.

Jill said...

I really really want to see an Air Supply reenactment, too.

Edge said...

Almost voodoo-ish in your gingerman torture!


C. said...

Ahhhh the wonderful memories of Strawberry Hill Boone's farm... It was my "liquor up the ladies" alcohol of choice.... :) You know I love ya Ambs....;)

Hook Em'


Sass said...

Sounds like a great way to spend a friday night. The several of those i have done with my girlfriends is at first like breaking legs and changing a tire - but once everyone is there we have a grand time. Except if i was there the number of people you made fun of would have been in the double digits.

Karen said...

I wonder if you can still do the helmet voice in hell. Afterall, what's the worst that could happen. I will accept cash from the highest bidder to either publish or destroy the video:)

Just kidding,its safe with me, although it could resurface at next years party.

The Other Half said...

amber!!! ok...if i didn't like you before now...which i obviously did...i LOVE you now for drinking Boone's!! ;-)~


Alice said...

aww... that sounds FABULOUS! i miss having a group of my girls i can count on to be around for parties like that. and i agree, that video MUST be leaked. i'm lookin' at you, karen! :-)

Marissa said...

I still think it's pretty damn funny!!! Sounds like you girlies had a BLAST!!!

beckibee said...

Members only! Ha!

My fav part is in the Air Supply Song when you acted out "I can make all your demons be gone" and smacked my forhead, sending my drunk ass across the room. Priceless!

dasi said...

I used to have a cassette with that very special Air Supply song taped over and over and over for the full 30 minute side. Because for some strange reason, it reminded me of the idiot I was in love with at the time and I liked to fall asleep to it. Or cry to it - depending on idiot's mood. Maybe because we skated to it during "Couples Only-" yeah, that must be it! And therefore, I feel that with my Air Supply history, I am ENTITLED to see the video. (please????) ;)

Chief Slacker said...

I may not have been there but it definitely sounds like one heck of a good time :O) Hope that carries over into a great new year :O)

Marie said...

LOL! Sounds like quite the evening. Glad you had a great time. :)

Jenn said...

Amber, adopt me as a friend! And then I'll bring my friends, 'cause I totally wasn't there and I still think it's funny!

We need to damn have an A-List party. I'm calling all those bitches this weekend!

Cheryl said...

I thought it was pretty funny anyway. Sounds like a good time to me. Easy to see why you all are A-list.

The Husband said...

after reading that i really wish i was there.

lil'bitty said...

ONYX. . . . du du da let the boys be boys. I guess in this situation it would be "let the girls be girls". Sorry that's all I know. Somewhere in the gestational phase of my life I inherited some of Mommy and Daddy's memories, because I have never actually heard that song. But I digress, it sounded like a lot of fun. Maybe one day when I'm much older and of legal age I can join you in your A-list party.

Romeo Jensen said...

okay so I havent had the chance to comment lately so in summation

any girl that drinks coors... and has "Cowboy" as her stripper song... totally has my heart.

I'm working up my own "chippendale" dance for you and I'm using "The Devil went down to Georgia" for the musc


ShyRocket said...

Great story... Happy New Year!