Ok, so I know they call this ridiculous situation I’m in the dating “game,” but I’d like to amend that order to “dating, minus the game.” I'd also like my salad dressing on the side, if you could.
I know, everyone says that they just want a relationship with no games and no drama. If that’s really the case, then please, for the love of god, STOP RUNNING GAME. If you like me, great, let’s hang out. If not, great, just tell me so I can stop wondering if you’re going to call. I’m not a fragile flower whose world will crumble if things between us don’t work out. I cry every week at “Extreme Makeover: Home Edition” but if you’re going to continue to be a jackass, trust me, I won’t be crying when you’re gone.
Now, the reason I say this is that History Boy is playing some sort of game. We have a good time together, things are decidedly less awkward than at the beginning and seem to get better as time goes on. However, he does stuff that seems like he’s not that into me. Yes, I’ve read the book. For example, he puts off making weekend plans with me. Like this -- we were supposed to go out the night before he went to London, and he told me early in the week that it might not work out because his parents were coming in that evening and staying with him. So Friday morning he says he’s still not sure when they’re getting there, but he’ll call me as soon as he knows. He called at almost 7, and it was to tell me that he couldn’t go out. Whatever – I totally knew that would happen and so I was already two glasses of wine into a great evening at Sally & Joe’s. But it was irritating for two reasons – one is that you better not think I’m going to be cool with you blowing me off at 7 on a Friday evening, because that’s just rude, and two, if you liked someone, wouldn’t you want to see them before you left town for a week? Anyway, I decided to wait and see what happened when he got home.
He got back on a Saturday night and called me on Sunday. I saw him that Monday, and we had a good evening. We talked via text on Tuesday, and then he called me on Thursday night to tell me that he wanted to see me over the weekend, but that he had plans on Friday and Saturday -- maybe Sunday would work? Ok, fine, but again, pushing the envelope with the Thursday night call. He actually ended up coming over Friday night and we hung out and then fell asleep until about noon on Saturday. He left, things were great, not “wheird” at all, and I haven’t heard from him since. I sent him a text on Saturday night to see if we were going to do something Sunday, and I STILL haven’t heard from him.
Mind you, I’m not upset about this – I’m not like “what if he doesn’t call, what if he doesn’t like me” because I know he’ll call. I’m irritated because he seems to think that this sort of behavior is just fine. It’s not. Dude, here’s the thing. I realize that your job is demanding – you just started at a private law firm, they expect you to put in the hours, fine, whatever. I know we’re just “dating” and therefore I don’t expect to be put at the top of your list of priorities. But I also think we need to have a little sit-down about the basic expectations around common courtesy. I like to talk on the phone – I talk to my friends pretty much every day, even if it’s just a message or a quick “hey, what’s up?” If you aren’t the every day checker-in guy, all you have to do is tell me and I’ll be fine with that. Do I want to see you? Sure. Are you worried that if we talk or see each other too much, I might think that we’re dating exclusively? Because if that’s the case, maybe I should let you know – I’m also dating someone else. Are you worried that when I say I’m not doing anything on Saturday night it’s because I’m lonely and sad and have nothing to do? Actually, it’s because I just haven’t figured out what I’m doing. Ask Kendra – whenever she asks what I’m doing, I always say “nothing.” Are you scared that I might be getting emotionally attached to you because I’m a girl and that’s what girls do? Uh, no. Remember how I told you that I’ve dated a lot of jerks in the recent past and so I have the guard up pretty high? It’s still up. And you have the added bonus of screwing me over before, and while I’m not holding that against you, I’m also being pretty cautious, just in case.
I’m not trying to have the whole “where do we stand” relationship talk – I don’t want or need that, because I’m still not sure if I have potential long-term feelings for him. I mean, I do like him, but it’s only been about a month, and I also couldn’t make a decision right now as to which of the two boys I like more. In fact, if this game continues, he’s going to keep plummeting in my mental ratings, while Boy 2’s stock is on the way up. All I’m asking is for a little bit more consideration in the respect and common courtesy department. Am I right? Am I wrong?
Oh, and also, you might check out my stick drawing of Alice getting attacked by a rooster...